As a Business Coach and Licensed Counselor, I readily point out to clients the impact of using a hedge word. I’ll ask them to repeat the sentence they just said and take out the hedge word. I watch them smile as they realize the difference. Some examples include… I’m “kind of” frustrated with the slow growth of my business, I’m “a little” disappointed that so and so didn’t call me back or I’m “somewhat” pleased with my success. The negative impact of a hedge word is huge. You will be amazed at how different you feel when you take out the hedge word or phrase and tell the truth!
Hedge words get in the way of communicating clearly and truthfully. Fully Expressing Emotions helps you feel more alive and empowered. In a relationship this creates a deeper sense of satisfaction and trust.
From another angle, using hedge words can be the first step towards owning and expressing your full truth. It is better to acknowledge and express your feelings by using a hedge word, then not say anything at all. Always remember “baby steps” are the key to success!
TIPS for Getting Better At…
- Really, really care about making a change (using fewer hedge words)
- Awareness is key. Pay Attention. Acknowledge when you use a hedge word.
- Don’t get down on yourself. You won’t conquer this easily. It will take time.
- Notice the difference (when you take out a hedge word) in how you feel.
- Praise yourself for making progress and keep in mind “Progress is a Process.”
Feelings are Facts and there is no denying them. We can soften the intensity of a strong feeling by using a hedge word. Each of us has a different level of comfort when it comes to expressing difficult feelings. Using a hedge word may be the perfect place to start. Hopefully you will eventually feel comfortable taking them out.
Let me know how it goes for you. I “kind of” want to hear from you 🙂
Margo Geller, LCSW – Licensed Counselor, Business and Life Coach
Call me for a complimentary consultation. I’d love to help you!
404-218-4559
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